Weaning

I questioned even writing this post, as it surrounds a sensitive, private, and somewhat hotly debated topic, but since this blog was created to chronicle Ella's milestones and special moments, it's a must.

Nursing, for myself as much as for Ella, has been a major part of the parenting journey so far. When she was a newborn, I felt like I'd never get my body back to myself, and there were definitely moments of resentment. However, most of the time, it was and has been just this magical continuation of my relationship with my daughter that started when she was in my belly. It was how we stayed connected to one another even though we no longer shared the same physical space. It was, overall, one of the biggest joys and blessings of the 16 months we've spent, day and night, together. I'm sad to see it go. Many tears have, and will be, shed in its passing.

But, for the first time, I'm harboring this amazing feeling that Ella is really growing into her independence, and that, in turn, means I get some of mine back too. I decided to start weaning last Tuesday, really because Ella had been very sick with a stomach bug for about 3 weeks, and once she was well, I was desperate to nurse her less often. So I decided that I would start (very slowly) cutting back her nursing sessions from 6-7 per day down to none. I would start with the morning feeding, then after several days, I would cut out any other feedings that didn't surround napping or bedtime. Then, painfully, I would cut out the naps and bedtime. I assumed this would all take about 6-8 weeks. I was prepared; I had my gameface on.

Today is day 6. We are down to one nap and bedtime--although so far today she's napped in the car for 20 minutes and with Hal while he was with her this afternoon. So really, today we're down to bedtime. I won't go so far as to say that this process will be done in the next few days. I'm not rushing it. But the funny thing is that Ella doesn't seem to mind the speed of this process one bit. So, we'll see how the next 6 days go. If they're even partly as smooth as the last 6, I'll look back and wonder why I stressed out so much. Still, any prayers and good thoughts are greatly appreciated (especially about Mommy's emotions)!